When you’re in a long-distance relationship, being apart sucks for a number of reasons, not least of which is that you’re missing out on that all-important physical connection: holding hands, cuddling on the couch, kissing and, of course, having sex. It is undeniably tough for everyone involved. Though nothing will quite sate the desire to be with your partner physically, there are ways to get everyone’s needs met.


Over the past few years COVID forced us to innovate and find creative ways to stay connected. As a result, we've never had more tools available to make long distance relationships a bit easier. Before figuring out which of these options work best for your relationship, all partners involved should evaluate what they need to feel connected and satisfied, and then communicate that to each other. That will give you the information you need to choose the best option(s) for your relationship.

Some questions you should consider are: 

  • What are your non-negotiable needs around connecting with your partner and how often do you need to connect to feel satisfied in your relationship? 

  • How often are you able and willing to text/call/video chat? 

  • What insecurities, if any, do you have about long distance relationships and what do you need from your partner(s) to help you manage those insecurities?

  • What ways, if any, do you need to be intentional about how you spend social time outside the relationship in order to feel socially satisfied?


Once you establish those answers, you can get started looking into ways to connect, including the following suggestions: 

Get techy

Initiate a bit of tech foreplay and suggestive flirting with your partner. Try sexting throughout the day, sending nudes, texting flirty messages... BE CREATIVE!

Get on with the dirty talk

Use dirty talk as a chance to reminisce about past sexual experiences with each other and fantasise about future sexual encounters together. Phone sex can be fun!

Masturbate together

Have fun talking over the phone about the sex toys you want to try together, including remote app sex toys that let you take control of your partner’s pleasure. You can even try role-play during masturbation sessions over the phone. Plus video apps like Skype, Google Hangouts, and FaceTime can help you feel like you’re right there with your partner — even if you’re separated by hundreds of miles.

Share porn scenes you both like

Discuss the benefits of watching porn together and give each other feedback on what you like most about your favourite scenes.

Put it in writing

Write erotic handwritten cards to your partner to let them know you’re thinking about them in all the best ways.

Talk about your next sexy time together

If you’re missing your partner, dive into the distance, and send flirty texts about the last time you saw each other. Daydream about the next time you’ll be together by describing what you want your partner to do to you. Put yourself into the moment. And let them do the same!


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